He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize