...so i touched it.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize