Heybabeimwearingurpanties
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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