Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
