return my video game
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
