I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
