Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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