i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
