i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
