How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
