This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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