then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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