Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
