oh god the rape fog is back!
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
this is an emotional support booty call
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
