Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
worst night to have a conscience
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
