people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
So here I am, sexting at work.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
