guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
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