apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Randomize
