You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
