Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
