If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Randomize
