Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
