I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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