Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
