He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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