i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
