remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
