You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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