A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
