I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Randomize
