so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
