She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
dude i'm inner monologue high
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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