Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
