That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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