My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
