Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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