Where are you?
In a non slutty way
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize