I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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