It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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