So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
