3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I love you. Go after that dick
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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