So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
this is an emotional support booty call
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
