Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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