btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
