I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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