i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
