I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
