this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
