i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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