We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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